Anonymous said...
I think it's totally selfish of you not to put up a tree or anything. You do have other kids you know. It isn't all about Lilly. What about them and your husband.
My other "kids" are all grown-ups.
If they want a tree they can have one. Mostly males and could care less about a tree.
IF Sandra wanted a tree, she is better physically abled to put one up than I am (I'm a cripple you know) and has more time since she is not working. We own 4 artificial trees and more decorations than will fit on them.
I'm tired, I'm in pain. I started decorating for Christmas when I was 10. My brothers and I used to do it to surprise my folks. it was more fun for us and saved them the work.
And, yes Virginia (anonymous), Christmas does tend to center on the children.
Lilly was the fresh awe and wonder that was going to put the magic back into our Christmas.
I'm not the only one who is missing her deeply. Her Gramps, uncles Rob and Willie, great grandparents, and other extended family, like Don and family, who has never got to meet her, but will be here in Iowa for Christmas. Rob had planned on using his Christmas break for quality Lilly time. What I'm stating here isn't my own selfish wallowings. It is the voice of a family who deeply loves that baby too.
A child's first Christmas is special. We aren't given any chance to share it with Lilly in any way. They left last Friday and won't be home until "sometime after Christmas". You can't plan anything with an itinerary like that.
I also have two cats and two dogs. With Camper alone, tree is just going to get the shit beat out of it. Putting a tree up for just a short time would make more sense, but we don't know when to expect any time with Lilly.
And I'm guessing you don't know about grandchildren - because if you did, you would know - it is all about Lilly.
In my younger adult days, Christmas days were stressed. Two Christmas were mourned with the loss of babies. Hard to celebrate His birth when your mourning the death of your baby. My bone tumor was diagnosed just days before Christmas. That financial devastation alone stopped any future adoptions of children.
My children have memories of Christmas that were magical. I gave it all to make sure their memories would be happy ones.
When Jeff and Tina lost Anna Marie, also just before Christmas, the entire family through multiple generations was devastated.
Lilly is the baby we could truly celebrate again.
And we weren't even given a chance.
1 bear growls:
I didn't put up a tree either and I've got three kids at home. Sometimes you just don't do feel like it. I find Christmas soooo depressing since it's all commercialized now. bleh. I asked each kid if they could remember what they got for Christmas last year. All three had to seriously think and only one remembered.
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